Your erotic cabaret...

is non stop..



i remember the night
when i held you in the water
and everything was perfect

your body was so warm
and you fit so perfectly
i knew it wouldn't be the same

my breath on you neck
and your arms over mine

i go back to then
close my eyes
and smile.

there was no baggage
nothing but you and i

that is how i feel about you
i can work through anything
hold on forever

all it takes is a twist of the ring on my finger
and a few seconds to close my eyes
and feel you

it doesnt make sense
but who says it has to?
this is new
you're helping me learn

the thought of you ignites something
deep inside of me
that i did not know existed

but it does.

i will wait.

You're wearing too many belts.....

and I bet they leave welts...

mmm.


so I've been here for a week now... and it's pretty much been a good week.
I've gotten some things worked out for school, which is definitely good.

I have been chillin on capitol hill a whole bunch, and it's pretty much awesome
my college couldn't be in a better area.
I got a tattoo there the other day... hurt like a biotch, but it looks pretty fuckin hot.

haha.... we keep seeing drag queens and like.... just plain queens.
it's super funny, and keeps life interesting.
trent has nothing to worry about.

I got like... assaulted by this SUPER FAB queen last night... he had like corn rows, and a giant gut... and was all about the wrist flick... he called me hunny, and kept asking if I was "family"... totally didn't get it until rachel explained it to me... he like, told my friends (who were trying to save me) to shut up... and kept telling me how cute I was.. I started to laugh really hard, thanked him, and walked away... quite the experience.. haha

then later... ashley decided it would be cool to go up to some guys car on the road, and like... tell him she thought he was cute, and give him her number..... does that scream "hooker" to anyone else?.. haha, it was cute though, she's like 5 feet tall.

I'll just rack that up to all of the fun nights I've been able to spend here. Yeah, it's hard to be without trent... but his phone calls cheer me up, and we've got a generally amazing relationship that everyone and their grandmother should be jealous of.... hell, even their grandmother's toy poodle should be jealous of this.... haha, I love him, and that's all that matters..

boo.... school just needs to start.
we move in on Saturday (3 days, yo)

living here makes you question everyones gender... I am wrong about whether someone is a man or a woman about 90 percent of the time.... haha... I should totally be better at this.

yay for being poor!!! haha.




dominatrixsupermodelbeautyqueen.. hella?

i promised

so here's the recap.

his name is Trent, and I'm crazy in love with him... so we'll start there.

he came down from his house to janesville... and met me at my place.
and we went to culvers for some dinner
then we went to see "the descent"... scared the crap out of me.. but all I could think about was how much i liked him

then we went and broke into rockport pool to skinny dip
we kissed in the deep end for the first time.. and i knew right then and there.. that this was different
then we layed on a blanket under the sky until 5 a.m..

and then... i knew how much different this was
we had sex, and it was better than I could have ever imagined

and i knew that i had fallen in love with him

he left, and all i could think about was him... i walked around in this daze...
i knew what it was like to be in love
in love... such a crazy thing

he convinced me to talk to my mother
so we talked... about him... about my feelings
about what i've been doing... about how much i love him
she wanted to meet him

he came down on wednesday night
we went to madison to meet his friends.. and i loved them
then we spent the night at my place... and i fell asleep in his arms
in the morning... we left to see his family

i loved them... and i had such a great day with all of them
then we went to his apartment alone for the night
and that night... was amazing.

the next day we spent with my family at Mt. Olympus....
it was so great, my family loved him so much
and i had a great day, the best day i can remember
i loved him even more.

at the end of the day... we ran into some idiots
but he held my hand.. and was proud of me, of him, of us
it meant so much... i couldn't even take it

that night we spent at my place...
i held him, watched him sleep
loved him all the more

the next morning... in the shower
i told him i loved him
i held him
he said i back....
i gave him a ring that has "daniel loves trent" engraved on the inside

i saw him again the monday before i left
i drove to pick him up
we came back to janesville for my brother's birthday
it was so good to see him with my family

we went back to his apartment, and went to dinner with his sister and friends
we layed together in his bed for the last time
took a shower, and i was just so happy to be with him again
i left

now i'm in seattle.... and i know i can make it
i love him so much, i can do this
i would never do anything to hurt him
ever

his calls make me happy... his voice is all i need
this is what it feels like to find your true love
i'm so happy

cheerio

he's my blue dinosaur.


this is my last post from this house
my last post from wisconsin... at least for a bit.

I'm overwhelmed... but I think I'm finally packed up to leave for seattle.

I'm leaving at about 4... so in approximately 2 hours.

last week was amazing... i was pretty busy with trent.

I don't want to leave him... but i have to.... and the fact that even he tells me that i have to leave... makes me love him even more.

yeah... it moved fast... but if you could feel even a tiny bit of how i feel when i'm with him... you would understand why.

I'm happy that i trust myself fully to wait for him... i know i wont even be tempted otherwise.

I'm just scared that he can't do the same.... but i tell myself that he feels the same way about me.. and that he wouldnt hurt me.

I'll be back as soon as I can get here... and looking forward to that moment, is keeping my chin up.

I'll go into more detail about the past week when i get settled in a little in seattle... until then, you all should know the digits...

this definitely isn't goodbye.